The roar of a sports car, a pair of sunglassed eyes, and a Tasmanian number plate turned the final moments of regular Married At First Sight programming into a frenzy, confirming one of the experiment’s worst-kept secrets.
After a bizarre verbal swordfight between Ryan and Jacqui during their final vows, the producers went full monty and teased the fact that the bride had since shacked up with ex-contestant Clint (who owned a fancy sports car and lived in Tasmania).
“I will find my person. It’s going to happen sooner than I think though,” Jacqui quipped, knowing full well she would be on the pages of every tabloid newspaper soon enough.
It was an almost Shakespearean end to her and Ryan’s frustrating relationship, with her trademark whip-smart retorts, some dramatic set pieces, soaring music, and no shortage of melodramatic twists.
“In a world of red flags, you are the red carpet,” the bride told Ryan during their final vows, in which both confirmed they were well and truly done with each other.
@mafs It’s the final vows conclusion you absolutely will not want to miss… 🫣 #MAFS ♬ original sound – Married At First Sight
Viewers would have noticed the stark contrast from earlier in the episode when the couple were reminiscing about their supposedly repaired relationship and looking back on all the good times.
“I love Ryan, and I want him in my life,” Jacqui said. “Is Ryan a good husband? Absolutely not”.
Ryan began the verbal sparring during the final vows, saying that “a healthy relationship is not a performance review” and that it was “impossible to look over the roadblocks”.
Jacqui then said she was “not a rehabilitation centre” and claimed it was Ryan who caused the issues during their marriage.
“I genuinely fear the differences in our worlds. Right now, we aren’t strong enough to continue this marriage. The good times were only possible because I temporarily ignore my feelings.
Not having a bar of it, Ryan was ready to get out of there like his pants were on fire.
“Goodbye, and thanks for all the criticism. What a f***ng shambles,” he said.
“I feel sorry for the next man who wants to be with her. Princess Jacqui wants a doormat of a man she can just walk right over“.
And with a final flick of the tongue, he was out of there.
“Be gone with you ya horrible woman. Be gone!”
The comic absurdity of the Jacqui and Ryan situation was eclipsed by an earlier breakdown between Carina and Paul, where Carina finally said au revoir to her fickle Frenchman.
“There’s not a doubt in my mind that you are the one for me. I’m ready to build a future that will last,” Paul pleaded.
But it was too late. His constant trust betrayals were one too many for Carina to forgive.
“I can’t ignore the good times in this experiment; however, I vowed to myself that my life partner would be a man I completely trust,” she said.
“You threw it all away in a selfish act. You were given a test, and you failed. Paul, I was yours, you had me, and you ruined it. Now you’re going to have to live with it for the rest of your life”.
Regular Mafs viewers know the season isn’t complete without at least one fairytale ending, and that came in the form of – you guessed it – Rhi and Jeff.
“Rhi, I am falling in love with you. Rhi, you are it for me. I choose you, and I hope it is forever,” Jeff crooned.
The gushing bride replied that she felt the same way, and the former friends waltzed off into the sunset together as lovers.
With the formalities now over, it comes down to the much-anticipated reunion to wrap up a scintillating season of this show we all hate to love and love to hate.